Dear Dolores,

I have been going out with my former supervisor for a year, but our relationship is still a secret. He’s a lot older than me and says he wants to find the right time to go public with our affair. He always says that is going to happen soon, pero hasta ahora nada. I’ve missed so many events in his life. I know he loves me and I love him, but I’m losing my patience. What should I do?

—Dilemma in Seattle

Dear Dilemma,

Yours is the kind of letter that makes my eyes roll 360 degrees inside my head, which has driven me to wear prescription glasses. I cannot give you an answer because all I have are questions: If he’s your former supervisor, does that mean you no longer work together? Did you get a promotion? Did he go on Social Security? Is there or isn’t there a job-related conflict about your relationship? Are those missed events in his life things like Christmas? Thanksgiving? Birthdays? Is he married?

The main problem here is that you already know what to do, so I'm not even going to give you an answer until I have all of mine!

—Are secret lovers even lovers at all? D