We all love some good "are they or aren’t they?” "did he cheat first or did she?” celeb relationship gossip. But, aside from the fun (and sometimes downright shocking) tales, these stars are actually doing us a service. By watching their love stories, we learn a lesson about our own. Here are our biggest takeaways.
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1. Cameron Diaz: Love Takes Timeinstagram/@benjaminmadden
Diaz spent most of her career dating sexy Hollywood’s A-listers like Justin Timberlake and Jared Leto and seeming pretty much anti-marriage: she told InStyle back in 2014 “I don’t think anyone is naturally monogamous… but we live in a society where it’s been ingrained in us to do these things.”
She was like the ultimate cool-girl bachelorette who could have, and leave, any man she wants.
But, when she married rocker Benji Madden in 2015 at age 42, we realized happily ever after’s have no timeline. We don’t have to worry about when everyone else is getting married or having children, or whatever, there’s no better schedule than the one that comes naturally. Oh, and a younger man (Benji’s seven years younger) never hurt nobody!
2. J. Lo: You Have to Fight for Yourselfinstagram/@jlo
Sure, the Shades of Blue star has been married three times and never seems to stay single for more than five minutes. But when Jennifer Lopez was writing her book, “True Love,” she got surprisingly real with her fans, and herself, admitting that she has felt mentally, emotionally and verbally abused in some of her prior relationships.
About that realization, the singer-actress told People, “I had to learn to take care of myself and know my worth. When things are not working out, and you’re not being treated in a way that you want to be treated, you have to look at that because it’s nobody’s fault but yours. You have to take control and you have to set up your own boundaries. You have the power to change it.”
Message received: no more settling for less than we deserve.
3. Christina Milian: Don’t Rush In
After a whirlwind romance (the pair got married just six months after they started dating), Christina Milian and The-Dream broke up 10 months after saying "I Do" amid infidelity accusations when photos surfaced of the rapper-producer getting cozy with his assistant. At the time, the singer Tweeted: “Whatever you think, believe it.” And the "Single Ladies" writer posted this on his website: “It’s easy to say that it’s because of another woman or a new relationship but truthfully, IT’S NOT.”
While the relationship gave the exes a beautiful baby girl, we wonder if the duo would have been more successful if they had taken things a little slower. Or, if they would have realized they weren’t meant to be before walking down the aisle.
There’s nothing wrong with taking things slow.
4. Christina Aguilera: It’s Not About the Moneyinstagram/@m_rutler
When Xtina started dating Matt Rutler, a production assistant she met while filming Burlesque, we were a little surprised. After all she’s an internationally famous pop star. Didn’t she want to date another internationally famous pop star? Apparently not, and the couple has been going strong for the past six years: getting engaged and welcoming a baby girl in 2014.
We hear you, girl: Don’t get caught up in fancy titles, it’s the heart that counts.
5. Selena Gomez: Let the Bad Boys Go Alreadyinstagram/@justinbieber
Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber sure were fascinating to watch. Almost daily we were smh’ing at the latest debbacle and asking ourselves if she would continue to stay with him through all that messiness. After years of break ups and make-ups, "The Heart Wants What It Wants" singer finally said peace out for good in 2014. While new love The Weeknd isn’t exactly a choirboy either, he’s a far cry from the Biebs’ shenanigans and she seems genuinely happy.
Sure, bad boys are sexy and all, but a girl can only take so much. Get out before they take you down.
6. Mariah Carey: 1—Never tattoo a man’s name on your body AND 2—Listen to your gut
When it comes to relationship lessons, Mimi is the gift that keeps on giving. There was a lot to learn from her relationship with Nick Cannon, but when they got inked with each other’s names we knew that didn’t bode well (and why oh why so large Nick?) but when they broke up and subsequently spent time and money getting them altered/removed, we were reminded that tattooing your lover’s name on your body is the kiss of death.
On the bright side, when she ended her relationship with gazillionaire James Packer, and took up with her backup dancer, Bryan Tanaka, we couldn’t help but be impressed (though not with that lawsuit, like wth?) that she followed her heart.
7. Zoe Saldana: Get Yourself a Progressive Maninstagram/@zoesaldana
When Zoe married Italian artist Marco Perego, we were all the congratulations emojis (the man is hawt). But when we learned that he took her name, we were majorly impressed. In 2015 she told InStyle, “I tried to talk him out of it. I told him, 'If you use my name, you're going to be emasculated by your community of artists, by your Latin community of men, by the world.' But Marco looks up at me and says, 'Ah, Zoe, I don't give a s--t.'"
Just yes girl yes.